We talk a lot about vulnerability, but very few people truly understand what it feels like.
From the outside, vulnerability can look simple. That view comes from a place of safety.
We all see the world through our own eyes, through our own experiences, through what hasn’t happened to us.
That creates a gap between those who feel safe enough to be vulnerable and those who’ve learned that vulnerability comes at a cost.
For some people, being vulnerable doesn’t feel freeing; it feels dangerous.
Their experience has taught them:
If I show this, I’ll be judged.
If I speak up, I won’t be heard.
If I’m honest, it will be used against me.
So, they adapt, they harden, they withdraw, they suppress.
Not because they don’t want connection, often it’s because they’ve learned survival first.
Unless you’ve been there, or you’ve sat alongside people who have, it’s hard to truly understand.
It’s hard to feel what it’s like to be unheard, what it’s like to feel less than, what it’s like to live in a system that doesn’t reflect you. So, we interpret behaviour through our lens.
We might see silence as disinterest, anger as aggression, and withdrawal as laziness. When sometimes, it’s protection - years of pressure with nowhere safe to go.
To truly understand someone, we must step back from our own perspective and ask, ‘What might this feel like from where they’re standing?’
The impact we have on others is measured by how it lands, no matter the intention.
If we want better conversations, stronger communities and less disconnection, we must start by making it safe enough so that people feel they can open up.
Let’s talk!
We All See The World From Our Own Eyes!