Do you know your warning signs?
Sometimes we get so engrossed in our work that we forget about taking time out to recharge the batteries. The last thing that we want to do when we're busy is slow down. We're afraid of getting more behind, or just never know what the next email/letter/phone call may bring.
After years of trial and error, I have worked out that when the corners of my eyes start to burn it is time to slow down for a day or two. Others I have talked with have a similar warning sign - a knot in the stomach, sore or tight shoulders, a heavy chest perhaps, or some other physiological sign.
For every negative psychological effect, there is a physiological response. When we worry about something it will manifest in the body somewhere.
Find what your indicator is and listen to it. Rest when you need to, to be in a slump if you need to, to feel down if that is the emotion you are feeling at the moment. And, when the time is right, - get up, dress up, front up - and get back into life once again.
Let's talk!
Changing A Habit.
160 days until the new year - halve that, and we're left with two "sets" of 80 days.
You might be thinking, it's great you can do maths Lance, but what does this mean for me?
Well, it takes 60 to 80 days to change a habit. Although you may start to notice a change after 21 days, and it becomes easier from that point forward - it generally takes 60 to 80 days to change a habit.
Even though we’re in the second half of the year, there's still plenty of time to transform one to two habits before 2025 arrives.
How often have you said, "I'll wait until after Christmas," "I'll start on New Year's Day," or "I'll change when..."?
By the time those milestones arrive, you'll already have a strong foundation and be well on your way to success if you start now.
So what's one goal you've been putting off? What habits do you want to change before the new year?
Don't wait for the 'when' or the 'right time.' The time to change is now. Right now.
Let's talk!
Do You Know Your Warning Signs?
Do you know your warning signs?
Sometimes we get so engrossed in our work that we forget about taking time out to recharge the batteries. The last thing that we want to do when we're busy is slow down. We're afraid of getting more behind, or just never know what the next email/letter/phone call may bring.
After years of trial and error, I have worked out that when the corners of my eyes start to burn it is time to slow down for a day or two. Others I have talked with have a similar warning sign - a knot in the stomach, sore or tight shoulders, a heavy chest perhaps, or some other physiological sign.
For every negative psychological effect, there is a physiological response. When we worry about something it will manifest in the body somewhere.
Find what your indicator is and listen to it. Rest when you need to, to be in a slump if you need to, to feel down if that is the emotion you are feeling at the moment. And, when the time is right, - get up, dress up, front up - and get back into life once again.
Let's talk!
What Can We Take From Movies?
Movies are a favourite hobby of mine, I try to watch one each night. Although Action is my preferred genre, some of the best quotes come from family movies.
Here are 5 great quotes from family movies, and my interpretation of them.
✨ "You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." - Christopher Robin, Pooh’s Grand Adventure: The Search for Christopher Robin
I never had self-belief, I relied on others to help me. If I took the pills and followed the instructions I would be okay, right? Maybe. Yet if I believed I could do it, had to do it, there was nothing left but to do it, then perhaps a transformation might occur. It did.
Take it from someone who wondered how people could let themselves get so unwell, who thought that 'they' needed to take control of their lives, who once thought meditation was for weak people, who could not fathom how someone would want to end their life.
You are stronger than you think you are, that's the key.
✨ “My job is to protect her from the scary stuff she can’t see. I plan for the future.” — Anxiety, Inside Out 2.
For most of us, anxiety is the brain's way of conducting a risk management process to keep us safe. Our brain is looking ahead at what could go wrong so that we are prepared with contingencies. And that is a good thing, you need this.
The problem is that our brain tends to exaggerate the risks, it multiplies the risk and makes everything seem overwhelming.
If you have something on your mind, remember that talking is the best option to resolve problems we haven't been able to solve ourselves.
Talking with others extends the knowledge and experience needed to find the appropriate resolution strategy. Talking also helps to bring a new perspective to our issue.
✨ "Oh yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it." - Rafiki, The Lion King
Looking back can be helpful - to good times, to make amends, to learn, or to see how far we have come - but never look back to regret what occurred. "It is what it is because it was what it was."
✨ "Let it go." - Elsa, Frozen
There is little that you can do to change the past other than to fix what you can as much as possible and apologise to those you have hurt if you can't undo what is done.
There is not one person who has never made a mistake. Deal with your past demons as much as possible, without adding to the damage already caused (i.e. by hurting others), and move forward.
✨ "When life gets you down, you know what you gotta do? Just keep swimming." - Dory, Finding Nemo
Picking yourself up after a fall is not easy, in fact, some never can without continued support from something or someone. Finding a way back up is different for us all, the common ground is that you must keep going. Keep reading, keep trying, and work hard to find the techniques that will work for you.
Just keep swimming.
Let's talk!
You Are Not Mental!
"You're a mental!" A sentence said in jest by me growing up as a child of the Baby Boomer generation. As children, we seldom know what we are saying.
As adults, we know better. The words you use in jest can bully, humiliate, hurt, and ultimately destroy another person.
I'm a mental, a person who has had a mental illness.
Those words 'mental illness' conjure up all sorts of things. Words matter
I am a person who has had a brain sickness.
Brain sickness comes in many forms, from totally debilitating to those controlled with medication, to those who have recovered. Note I did not say fully recovered. Just like when you break a bone there is always a weak point where the bone has repaired itself. The same happens with your brain, there is always a weakness that you have to be careful with.
I used to think that all you needed to do to get over depression was to harden up and get on with things. That is not so, these days!
If you have had a serious broken bone, you may be left with continual pain that has to be managed by medication. It is okay to take medication for the pain of a bone injury, to go to the doctor to get help with healing - and therefore it is no different to take medication to manage the pain inside your head, or to seek help from a professional.
I am lucky, I do not have to take medication. But I do have to ensure I get enough sleep, exercise, and socialisation so that I do not get sick again.
When I had a mental illness, a brain sickness, I had a mild case of depression. (I convince myself it was mild, as it only lasted for a year, and I didn’t need prescription medication to recover).
Note that I didn't say that I 'suffered' from it, I 'had' it. Suffering is another negative word that we attach to the term mental illness. I wouldn't wish what I went through on anyone, not even for our worst enemies. However, what I learned about life on my journey I could not have learned any other way. And for that, I am very grateful. More grateful still to those who stuck by me.
There are many great people I know who have been to see the black dog and returned to be much wiser. Not stronger, wiser.
Some of those people love to share their gift with others so that other people don't have to go through the same thing. Listen to these people, and you will learn a lot.