Trick Your Brain, It's Easy

I am not an expert in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) but I have used a few of these techniques to trick my brain from thinking badly about a negative event thus reducing the emotional reaction each time thoughts of the negative event arrive in my head.

NLP provides an understanding of the mental and cognitive processes behind our behaviour to certain situations.  We can actually reprogram our brain using these techniques.  By changing the way we think about a situation we can change our emotional reaction and our perception as a result.  So how does that work?

Inside our brain is the amygdala which is responsible for our emotions.  When someone attacks us for example, the amygdala sends a signal to alert our emergency response mechanisms so that we can fight or flee.  The amygdala is attached to our hippocampus, this part of our brain stores our long-term memory.  So, when we have a bad event the amygdala alerts our response functions and the bad memory is stored for future reference.

This is the brain's way of protecting us so that if a similar event happens in the future we are ready for it.  The hippocampus and amygdala have worked in tandem to burn or 'brand' that bad memory into our brain. 

Taking the example of someone attacking us, every time you have some kind of a reminder or connection to that attack you also have an emotional reaction.  The connection to the attack could be a smell, a sound, a sight, or just a random thought of the attack.  When you are reminded of the attack, the hippocampus alerts the amygdala and you have the same emotional reaction as you had when the attack first occurred.   

While you can never completely remove this bad memory, you can lessen the subsequent emotional reaction each time the thought of the attack comes into your head.  In your mind, take an image of that negative event then put a picture frame around it.  Once you have the image inside the frame you then hang the framed image on a wall.  Now stand back and look at the picture again.  It is just a harmless picture. Our brain has been tricked into thinking the event never actually occurred.  You may have to do this several times to embed the effect. 

There are many other techniques, Dr Google can show you these.  I found this one very good, along with flicking an elastic band around my wrist each time I had a negative thought.  The pain from snapping band distracted my brain. 

Are You Empathic?

Gaining empathy is the first step to controlling difficult or challenging communications with another person.  Without empathy you won’t be able to move forward in the conversation.

Empathy is best described as seeing the situation through the other person’s eyes, as if you were standing in their shoes.  Placing yourself in their position will assist you in identifying the reason for their emotional behaviour. 

Empathy is not sympathy, the latter could be misinterpreted as pity. Empathy is about understanding the other person’s thoughts and feelings, an identification of their circumstances.

By reflecting back what the person has said to you using your own words, including use of the important words that they spoke in their sentences, will assist you to gain empathy. 

Here are some other quick tips to gain empathy;

• If you are talking to the person face-to-face then hold eye contact for around 60% of the time.  Be careful not to hold direct eye contact for too long with overly aggressive people as they will take it as a sign you are looking for a confrontation.
• Lean forward slightly to show an interest if seated, but not too far forward to make it look condescending.
• Mirror some of their body language when the person has calmed.  Mirror body language when someone is aggressive has the same effect as glaring at them. 
• Use their name early in the conversation to show that you are listening and you are an actual person.  Plus, we all like to hear our own name being said by others.
• Always be polite no matter how rude the other person may be.  Words such as “please” and “thank you” will gain you important brownie points when talking with those from the baby boomer generation.
• Respect their point of view.  You may disagree but know that your view may not be right.
• Ask for their permission if you need to go away and do something. This makes the person feel important.
• Use the word “important” when appropriate.  This pays to their ego.

Gaining empathy will lead to establishing a rapport provided you continue to say the right thing.

Prejudice

Prejudice.  Is there ever a single word that immediately provokes such intense emotion? We are often influenced by prejudice in one form or another. To be clear, I am not talking about racial prejudice, I'm talking about prejudgement becoming prejudicial to an open mind.

We prejudge others based on how their looks, what they are wearing, how they talk, what car they drive, who they associate with, where they live, the list goes on. 

Prejudging is more commonly known as generalisations, placing people and things into categories or boxes.  This can be a positive thing and can help keep us safe. You wouldn't walk headlong into a group of rowdy drunk people for example because you know the likely outcome. You prejudged the situation and came to a sound decision.

Prejudging stems from our extrinsic learnings; how we were raised, the friends we had, the interactions with others and a myriad of other influencers. However, prejudging becomes detrimental when it becomes prejudicial because reality is confused with our perceptions. 

Prejudices are based largely from negative events that we encountered which cloud our future interactions. They close-off our minds.

Here's an example.  I trained with the elite military forces of New Zealand, Australia and the United Kingdom. For those that know how hard these people train, you would have a vision of me in your head and placed me into a category.  I trained with these teams on military exercises, I was a negotiator talking on the phone. Now you're brain has probably taken me from one box and placed me into another. 

We do the same with voices.  We hear a voice on the phone and immediately have a vision of what that person looks like and respond accordingly. The last time you heard a voice on the radio you had a vision of that radio host and when you saw them in real life you were fascinated at how that voice could come out of that mouth. It was not the person you had pictured in your mind. When speaking with them in person you probably won’t hear what they are saying because your prejudgement doesn’t meet reality.

The next time you find yourself being influenced by prejudicial thoughts, know that it is just your brain protecting you from earlier encounters. Acknowledge then dismiss these negative thoughts as they are probably incorrect.

Keep an open mind when meeting new people, you will be pleasantly surprised at how similar we all are. Or maybe they aren’t which is even more fascinating.

Unplanned Absences - Abenteeism

Unplanned absenteeism is something that you may have to tackle as an additional item to improving the work environment. Despite your best efforts, absenteeism will always be an issue for call centres. If you have provided agents with the carrot – a fun environment – and absenteeism is still an issue you may have to introduce the ‘half-carrot’ approach. The half-carrot is not as harsh as the stick, threats and punishment do not work and only cause angst for everyone. In fact the stick method will have the reverse affect. If you have tried many things and short-term absences are causing an issue for your workforce team, you may consider introducing the Bradford identification tool.

The Bradford formula was developed at the Bradford University School of Management and is a human resource tool that identifies the most disruptive of absences by highlighting staff who take numerous short absences reported as illness, and provides an opportunity to focus assistance and support for those staff with a high score to return to full health. Intervention strategies for staff with long-term illnesses will be different from those with numerous short-term health issues and the Bradford formula is just one indicator which should inform effective management.

The calculation is the number of unrelated absence periods² multiplied by the number of days absent. For example, let's take 10 days absence in the reference period you chose (a year is the norm). If an employee took 10 consecutive days off work, [(1 x 1) x 10] equals a score of 10. The reason for the low score is it was just one absence therefore easier to plan for. Five absences of two days each which would be [(5 x 5) x 10] with a score of 250 whereas ten absences of one day each would end with a score of 1000. Note: The calculation is simply designed to identify staff who take lots of single days away from work across a year. It is not designed for any other reason and further investigation is required to establish why the employee needs the time away.

In a call centre where I was the manager of staff development, we set a score of 500 as the benchmark for the introduction of intervention strategies. This number was based on the average absence days across the year for all staff. A further consideration is the number of sick days per annum that staff are entitled to. If they have eight days per annum and take each as a single day the calculation would be 640. However given that most people have two or three consecutive days off over winter due to influenza then the calculation remains under 500. Importantly, the service organisation (union) were consulted and engaged throughout to ensure there was a full understanding of why the identification tool was being used. Similarly, terminology needs to be conducive to a positive introduction. Replace the word punishment with intervention, the word rule with guide, rehab with wellness, etc.

The intervention strategies included; not permitted to work overtime, no higher duties, off-site activities were declined, no volunteer work or secondary employment allowed. Agents also had to produce a medical certificate for each absence, paid for by the employer. There are many other interventions which are dependent on the type of call centre.

Guidelines are relaxed for those who for example had been afflicted with a single illness or injury which was now cured or healed. Examples of a singular event would include an operation, hospitalisation, etc. Other options to soften the guides include allowing overtime on financial hardship grounds, removing one month’s score if the employee attended continuously for one month without an absence, and not counting the absences if it was to assist their recovery such as elective surgery for a condition which was impacting on their wellbeing.

Remember, this is for the benefit of the employee. It is to identify those people who may be struggling at work and need your assistance. Use it wisely.

Exercise, I Don't Think So.

After sleep, exercise is the second most important thing that you can do to keep yourself mentally well. Exercise creates endorphins in the brain, those natural feel good drugs that provide you with a sense of euphoria. Long distance runners often speak of them and is the reason why some continue running through pain, the more pain the more endorphins the better the euphoric feeling.

Endorphins are the body’s natural opiate. They aren't addictive so don't panic. However, you may feel a little low if you do not get your usual 'fix' of endorphins each day that comes with your regular exercise routine.

You don’t have to run a marathon to get the health benefits of endorphins. Thirty minutes of moderate continuous activity is all it takes. Walking at a medium to fast pace is sufficient and the faster you run the greater the benefit. If walking or running isn't your thing then try vacuuming the house for 30 minutes continuously and see how that feels. Or mow the lawns, trim the hedge and wash the car without stopping.

It takes 30 minutes to get blood from your big toe circulating up to your brain and back again after travelling through your plumbing, the pipes and filters known as the kidney, liver and other necessary organs that take the rubbish out of your body.

Exercise is also how we remove excess adrenaline. Adrenaline is pumped into the body whenever we become stressed, when we feel the need to fight or to flee. Excess adrenaline causes unnecessary anxiety and if left unchecked can cause serious physiological and psychological harm.

A lesser known reaction to the excess release of adrenalin is diarrhoea. If we face a frightening situation, large amounts of adrenalin get released into the body with some of the chemical leaving the body out the rear exit. So, the next time you think you may have eaten a bad meal, think back as it may just be that you had a fright a few days earlier!

Back to exercise, the reason we are told to get more exercise than the suggested 30 minutes is simply to reduce weight. It's all about energy in and energy out. If you eat more or eat the wrong foods, you need to exercise more. And the better the food that you eat the greater the benefit and the healthier you will feel.

So, grab that vacuum cleaner and start working out.